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What is the most appropriate attire for a Seder?

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My daughter-in-law conducts a wonderful Seder every Passover, complete with traditional foods, readings, special family linens and silver - a really nice event. It contains many non-traditional elements as well, such as English language passages added to the original readings to acknowledge and commemorate certain present-day blessings and hopes. Friends of all faiths participate, and there's plenty of wine so most folks end up a little rowdy - it's a mix of Orthodox and highly unorthodox people and things.

My question is: what does one wear to such a function so that one's clothing reflects its joy and celebration as well as respect for the hostess and the religious aspects of the occasion? I always feel a little embarrassed for the peeps who show up in super-casual garb and then see how much trouble my DIL has gone to for this meal.

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3 answers

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ashley_87 [ Moderator ]

Since it is usually an evening affair, darker colors as a base would be best. Avoid cleavage, but a v-neck would be fine otherwise. Jeans are out, but anything more formal (skirt, trousers, dress, etc.) is fine. You can add a little festivity to it with your accessories, including some brighter colors (but not bright bright, just lighter shades) to form a contrast and a break if there are solid colors.

People may show up casual, but as long as they are respectful and it is ok with the hostess, then it would probably be ok to let it slide. As you implied, it sounds like it is a thankful, joyous occasion. However, slipping some hints about maybe dressing up a notch or to to the casual offenders would be perfectly fine if done discretely. Because you are the mother-in-law, it is perfectly fine for you to do this if you feel it necessary. Check with the hostess first, though! See if she would prefer if the overly-casual dress bothers her. Even if she says no, but it seems that it might, then it may be time to step in and take some action.

NN comments
wanda
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Awesome answer, Ashley, thank you so much.

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-1

violet

As it is celebrating Easter, I would wear a nice Spring floral dress that is not too flashy but also not to trendy. Pastel shades would be nice with a half sweater for sleeveless dresses or cool breezes.

NN comments
ashley_87
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Uhhh… it is a Jewish holiday. It is not celebrating Easter at all. In fact, what you described would probably be completely inappropriate.

violet
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oops my apologies. Didn’t realize it was not an easter celebration

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